Events & Issues

New Delhi, 9 June 2008   

Jeffrey Archer: The Other Side

LOVED IN INDIA, REVILED IN UK

By Dr. Syed Ali Mujtaba

In the third week of last month, a man who calls himself the greatest story teller on this planet visited Chennai. The celebrated author, none other than Jeffrey Archer, was there to promote his latest book 'A Prisoner of Birth.'

The master story teller sold over 1000 copies of his book at a ‘Meet the Author’ programme organised by a bookstore one evening with people queuing up to get his autograph. The enthusiasm of the crowd undoubtedly demonstrated that Archer is the top man in this business of story telling today.

Archer was at his best when he made the concluding remarks of his 30-minute speech. Asserted he, “Ladies and gentleman I am coming to India again this winters when the English cricket team tours this country.” He received a thunderous applause, paused and added, “I want to see the English team demolish the Indians on their home turf.”

The crowd went silent as his monologue continued. “India has won the toss and elected to bat first. Sehewag and Tendulkar open the innings.  Sehewag gets out for a duck, Tendulkar goes back to the pavilion for 3, Ganguly spoons up a catch at silly point for 9, Lakshman and Dravid add only another 25 runs. How much does that total, have you counted the score?” he asked and added, “I guess India is in tatters at 37 for seven and its time for lunch!”

The crowed got unnerved. Jeffery Archer has brought them down from ecstasy to gloom. Only to deliver his punch line. “Well folks don’t frown at me; I am just a story teller. Its Jeffrey Archer saying you goodbye” All this to develop a personal rapport with his readers but according to those who observed him silently, Archer exposed the wicked side of his personality.

Some were least impressed, not a few felt the renowned author sounded arrogant nurturing an inflated ego. He underscored this by stating, “After Margaret Mitchell's ‘Gone with the Wind,’ I am the most salable author in this world. While JK Rowling’s Harry Potter had 14 rejections, my first book, ‘Not a Penny less, Not a Penny More’ was rejected by 18 publishers,” were attempts to blow his own trumpet.  

Appalling, he hurled personal innuendos on at least three occasions during the question-answer session. The most atrocious was when he rebuked the person who escorted him from the hotel and moderated the Q & A session. Shouted Jeffery Archer in front of an overwhelming crowd, “You fool, you cannot handle this,” then turning to the audience, he ridiculed him, “You know this guy in the car was teaching cricket to this Englishman!” His escorts face went red.

Yet again, he was rude at the end of the session when another desperate fan eager to ask him a question, shouted, “Sir, let me ask the last question.” Shot back Jeffery Archer, “Who the hell you are to decide that, you got to be Jeffery Archer and stand over here, to do so.”

Not only that. During the course of his speech, Archer took a dig at the Indian press with a ‘much-concocted’ view. He asserted that the front pages of the Indian newspapers had Bollywood news and gossip, who-is-sleeping-with-whom-type of stories while the Barrack Obama-Hillary Clinton story figured on page 36. Evidently, Archer had his papers mixed up and was referring to the British press as Indian given that Indian dailies are 16 or 24 page  broadsheets which front page only political news.

However when the author poked fun at India’s traffic system and management and his harrowing experience travelling on Indian roads he received a huge applause. “I want to be the transport minister here to fix things right,” said he. 

Dear reader, my impression of the world’s most celebrated author Jeffery Archer: He is an English gentleman of the Victorian era age, to whom India is still a colony of the British Empire. True, he hurt many of his fans during the inter-active session but none took any objections, so overwhelmed by his aura were they. Not a few times Archer got away with all his innuendos because people were unable to understand him .

Remember, Indians worship their heroes to the extremes and can swallow any insult hurled at them. Had Archer been speaking to an audience in London, shoes and slippers would have been flying at him.

Ironically, even as we Indians adore him, Archer is quite reviled in the UK for his many indiscretions. Namely, being sent to prison for perjury, fraudulent investments, dodgy share deals, various 'pays vice-girl' stories, potentially robbing Kurdish refugees of significant amounts of money and being implicated along with Margaret Thatcher's son in the failed coup of Equatorial Guinea. The Conservative party, of which he was once President, threw him out long ago.

However, that apart, Jeffery Archer’s India tour covering six cities was a huge success, drawing packed houses. In fact, according to a market survey more Indians than Americans, Japanese or Australians read Jeffery Archer. His pirated copies are sold on busy road junctions. Asserted Archer, “If you are not sold on traffic lights, you have not arrived in India.” 

His parting shot, “Some one asked me, why I am doing all this? ‘You have made enough money, got a villa in Cambridge, a penthouse in London, an apartment in New York, what more do you want?’ I replied, “The crowd that gathers to listen to me, they jostle to have my view; they queue up to get my autograph, all this motivates me to keep on going. I want all this to go on forever and I am going to keep on writing for the next 30 years.” We all can look forward to reading him. ---- INFA

(Copyright, India News & Feature Alliance)